Over the last few years I’ve unknowingly developed several hobbies.  I think there’s just something about getting older that makes us say “Screw everybody else, let me do what I want to do.”  For me, that has manifested itself in everything from painting my walls to wreath making, gardening and African-drumming.  The first hobby I developed was gardening and I’ve been on a high ever since!  But hobbies have done more than given me something enjoyable to do, hobbies have helped me focus, inspired new and creative thought and have just helped me calm down. Black women are everything to this world.  We are the cashiers, nurses, secretaries, customer service reps, nannies and mothers of America.  No wonder we are wound up sooo tight!  We need a way to release and hobbies can do that. So here’s why I think every Black mom should have a hobby:

Get off the world’s TIME!  Get on your own! 

When I’m in my garden, I don’t give a damn what time it is.  I ‘m going to be out there until my heart is content and until I’m satisfied with the outcome of my work.  When I’m blogging/writing and can’t type fast enough to keep up with the words that are flowing from my mind to my finger tips, it doesn’t matter whether it’s 12 am or 12 pm, I’m just in my own flow.  That’s what having a hobby does for a woman.  It gets us off the 9 to 5, dinner-time, 8 pm prime-time schedule.  When I’m in hobby mode I let everyone know that my time is just as important as their time. When I take the time out of my day to strike base on the drum, it lets the universe know that for me time is not linear, it is spherical and that the flow of my time and energy starts and ends with ME.  Therefore, I must feed my soul first!

joking around on the drum (1)

Empty Your Mind to Fill it Up Again

Have you ever noticed that you get your best ideas when you’re in the shower or driving somewhere.  I know I have.  I personally think this happens because you’ve done these things in such heavy repetition that your mind is free to explore itself when you’re doing them.  When you’re doing the mundane, your mind says “Hey this is my time to dream!”  It’s the same way with a hobby.  At this point, I can plant a hosta with my eyes closed, I can wrap a wreath with burlap while instructing my son on brushing his teeth (I’ve done that before).  Because I enjoy my hobbies they are not a burden and my mind is free to think wonderful thoughts when I’m doing them.  I come up with so many great ideas when I’m inspired by the beautiful colors of the flowers I adorn my wreath with or when my hands are deep in the dirt of the Earth.  So many people think meditation is about emptying your mind.  I think it is too.  But I think the real process is dumping your mind of the world’s stuff, so that you can fill it up with YOU.  My hobbies help me fill my mind with the most thought-provoking and beautiful ideas that allow me to create my own realities.

joking around on the drum

‘Cause it ain’t all about you

My husband is a way better drummer than I am.  I am still a novice drummer (at my best), but when I first began learning he came in the house and picked up a djembe our instructor loaned us and showed me how much better he is than I am.  I was jealous, but I really enjoy taking drumming classes with him.  I love watching him drum.  It brings out a side of him I’ve never seen before.  My point is that my hobby was not just for me, it was obviously meant for us.  See, when people see you living in your truth, it inspires them.  It inspires them, not to live up to your standards, but to seek and live in their own light.   I’ll admit, my garden is one of the better green spaces on my block (with my dad and stepmom’s running a close second…lol), whenever someone walks by and says “You’re garden is beautiful,” I always hope the brightness of color and variation of textures has inspired them in some way.  Bottom-line, live on your time, in your truth and with your unique intention in order to be a catalyst for light in someone else’s life!

So, what hobbies are you thinking about?  Need some help?  Click here to get a list of 7 Hobbies Any Woman Can Start Now!


Cynthia Mendoza

Hello. Welcome to BrownMamas.com a blog for Black moms looking to thrive while raising kids in this hectic world and the headquarters for Pittsburgh Brown Mamas, a Pittsburgh support group for Black moms. Here I write about raising my three boys, living in and loving Pittsburgh, dating my husband, gardening and all kinds of other stuff. Thanks for visiting. Stay long & come often!

2 thoughts on “Why Every Black Mother Should Have a Hobby”

Mrs. Mendoza . October 26, 2015 at 1:46 pm

You came in a close second… Lol

Carla Jean . October 26, 2015 at 1:12 pm

“I’ll admit, my garden is one of the better green spaces on my block (with my dad and stepmom’s running a close second…lol)” Well glad that you like our garden and thanks for the honor of being a close second.

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