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brown mamas

blog Chapter One: Time Race

Chapter One is intended to help moms discover the limiting beliefs they may have around time. Oftentimes, when moms birth their first child the initial emotion they experience is that they are running out of time.

After watching the video, check-out the indexed content below and an activity for you to do with your group. Remember that each chapter has a corresponding journal prompt and workbook activity.

Matching Mind Check Card: Why do you think you are running out of time?

Above all, this question asks you to examine how you perceive time in your life. It asks you to consider whether thoughts of scarcity are real, or are simply cognitive distortions.

Indexed Content:

P. 36: Ultimately, we overcompensate for lack of internal worth by dunking ourselves and our kids into the pool of an assumed success path.

P. 41: It’s okay to slow down.  It is righteous to slow down.  It is godly to slow down.

P. 44 : Your time limitations are solely based on your perception of time.

Conversation Starter:  

To engage with your mama around this subject, you might want to think of a time when you thought you didn’t have enough money, time, resources or personal fortitude to accomplish a goal, meet a deadline or be present for something or someone, and still, everything worked out just as it should have.

Icebreaker –  

Check out this list of cognitive distortions.

Present this scenario to your mama and ask your tribe to identify the cognitive distortion that she is displaying with the thoughts listed below.

Shay is a single mom of two girls and is trying to finish her accounting certification.  She’s typically in school, or at work from 9am – 6pm everyday.  For the last 2 years she has also been working a part-time job on weekends and some evenings.  Two weeks ago Shay missed her daughter’s school play because she couldn’t take off work. She asked her children’s father to attend, but he had other plans that day. Shay’s mother often keeps her kids on weekends and fills in the gaps when she can’t be there.  Shay is optimistic about the future, but right now she feels a lot of mom guilt and wishes she had more time for herself. 

Here are some of the things Shay believes about her life.  Do you think these thoughts are true or false?  What is cognitive distortion might Shay be exhibiting.

Shay feels like she has no support in her life and often wants to stop talking to anyone.

Shay thinks that her daughter’s father purposely doesn’t show up for the children and that she should restrict him from seeing them because of his inconsistency.

Shay thinks that by the time she finishes school her children will resent the time she spent away from them.

Shay is afraid for her financial future and worries often that she’ll never live in a better neighborhood.

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