1. Run Your House Right
“I hate that word ‘housewife.’ I prefer to be called ‘domestic goddess.” -Roseanne Barr
All right my domestic divas, on a scale from 1-5, how well does your house run. Are your dishes washed every night? Do your children have any hobbies? Does your home look inviting and loving? In short, does your house run like Chipotle or Burger King. Walk into any Chipotle and you know exactly what you’re getting and what their mission is. Got to Burger King and honey you don’t know how long you’re going to wait. Your Whooper might be neat or sloppy and don’t’ you dare go through the drive-through, you might be there all night. I know it’s not easy, but honestly, a woman who ain’t washing here dishes every night is going to have a hard time succeeding at work, school or business. And, if she does, she’s going to have a hell of a situation to come home to after 5 o’clock. If 2014 was unfulfilled for you, look to your source first. If home is not first and foremost on your agenda, that might have been your stumbling block all along.
“Talent without discipline is like an octopus on roller skates. There’s plenty of movement, but you never know if it’s going to be forward, backwards, or sideways.”— H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Do you keep overdrawing your bank account? Are you late for work every other day? Do you tell yourself every year that your going to lose weight? Have you been running the same business for 5 years and went nowhere? Well, if any apply you might be lacking self-discipline. That doesn’t mean your bad at everything. You likely have some areas were you are extremely disciplined like getting the kids in the bed on-time and getting dinner on the table every night. You (and I) have got to work on creating systems that help us to prioritize what’s important from trivial, and the difference between a need and a what. If you’re like me, you have a million business ideas, and you are extremely talented. But the best of bums are smart and talented. Set yourself up to succeed by developing a plan for everything you do. From getting the kids settled down after school to opening a hair salon, the best of ideas are ones that are well thought out. So, get a planner, hang up a calender in your bedroom, use your cell phone to set time and date reminders, or find some free financial software that helps you keep track of finances better. For me, 2015 is all about laying the foundation for a successful life.
3. Less Social Media
“The wise do not buy into other people’s perceptions of who they are and what they are capable of. Instead, they bypass a person’s public persona and see who they are in their highest expression.” – Shannon Alder
One of the biggest flaws of Facebook, Instagram and any other social media platform is that it is largely a digital timeline of fleeting, happy moments from each participants life. In short, it ain’t real boo. I might post running through the park having fun with my kids on Instagram at 3 pm, but I’m damn sure not showing the fight with my hubby at 6 pm. If one compares their life to the moments of joy another person is a having at any given moment, they are not basing their happiness on the real, tangible moments they could be creating themselves. In 2015, I’m vowing to limit my social media intake in order to be happier with my own status quo, and to free-up more time to live my best life. In addition, I want to base the experiences I have with others on THEM. Not on what they post, or how their hair looked last Tuesday.
4. Upgrade Your Wardrobe
“If you can’t be better than your competition, just dress better.” Anna Wintour
I may never be rich or famous, or have a jacket of every shade of pink in my closet, but by the gods of Target, H&M and Nordstrom’s clearance rack, I know I can trick any streetwalker into thinking I am. One bra for every payday for 3 months, at least two classic white button up shirts, a nice blazer and one pair of heels that are comfortable and chic, those are the goals of my Grown Woman Wardrobe this year. I officially hit 30 two years ago, but my closet and mostly drawers are still full of sweats, shirts with words on them and every other manner of 20-year-old attire that needs to be officially retired. Plus, my hubby is tired of cotton undies. I love them, but he’s just not a fan. So my plan of action includes the creation of Grown Woman Wardrobe board on Pinterest (click here to view it) and to shop, on a brown mama budget, ’til I drop.
“You have not, because you ask not.” — Jesus c/o Denene Hefflin
A large part of what defines us as people is the quality of people we allow to take up residence in our lives. My most important vow for 2015 is to continue to expand my circle with people who are kind, thoughtful, open-minded and fun. Many times our goals seem impossible simply because we don’t have the support necessary to accomplish them. The most ironic thing is that the support is often there if you just extend your hand, and voice, and ask for it. One of my #goodmamas (as mentioned above) blessed me with that scripture a few months ago. “You have not, because you ask not.” If you want to be more outgoing in the New Year, or if you want to upgrade your real friend’s list, just do it! Let the universe know what you want, and be proactive in listening, being friendly, approachable and open. It’s really that easy.
If all else fails…listen to this for inspiration
Hello. Welcome to BrownMamas.com a blog for Black moms looking to thrive while raising kids in this hectic world and the headquarters for Pittsburgh Brown Mamas, a Pittsburgh support group for Black moms. Here I write about raising my three boys, living in and loving Pittsburgh, dating my husband, gardening and all kinds of other stuff. Thanks for visiting. Stay long & come often!